Dilemma

I have a choice to date a girl. At first I denied it completely. Then I considered what would happen if I did. My friends wouldn't alienate me as usual. My name wouldn't have that horrible air around school. I was planning to be president of a club and I may get more respect no longer seen as someone to hate. Then I think, i would be lieing to myself and using her. It's not what I want to do, but it's what I have to do for now. Tatu - Craving describes my situation exactly.

Months

Months in pain, sorrow and lonliness. I have cried but only on the inside. Poems made to express myslef because there was no one to listen. I have been publicized and alienated. I have alienated myself from them to protect myself. Alone.